Saturday, September 28, 2013

Childhood - a week in Sarawak

The coconut tree I burnt because my sister won't let me play with her

Used to be a library that my eldest sister and I established for the children of the village

My drain adventure - 10 guppies for 20 cents

The vase I kept my very own first pet (tadpoles) until they hopped away

Thursday, September 26, 2013

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Beauty vs personality

I was told by someone whom I said "hi" from a certain social network that I am lacking in that side a.k.a beauty, thus it justifies why I believe more on compatibility through personality. My counter argument was 'if beauty is used as the gauge, those who use it has to be of an equal". 

If you deemed a person as unattractive, do make sure that you are as hot as Jennifer Lopez, Megan Fox or Angelina Jolie. 

I am single and unable to find someone because I am not attractive. 

I just found out I am lacking in beauty, I thought I was so damm cute and hot. My mirror is shattered!!!! (Sarcasm)

I am living a lie

I still remember the first lie I told my mum and dad. I lied to them that the teacher did not give my report card for previous mid term examination. She did, I hid the report card from my parents and extend my lie to my teacher saying that I lost the report card and I paid for a new one. All because I failed my math (hate numbers).
But there are things that I wish I can share with my mum and sisters, like the day my ex broke my heart, or the day that I tendered my resignation to pursue a different path. And the real reason why I am going to Sarawak for a week. 
Last week, when driving my mum around, she asked about my ex, "is she well, is she engaged to be married, why doesn't she call and keep in touch with the family". I looked at my mum and smiled, "Mak, she is busy with her thesis, and this is her final year, she did text and said hi". It was a very calm and collected response but the truth was I wanted to reply "I told her not to keep in touch with the family because she dumped me and broke my heart". 

Friday, September 20, 2013


An interesting conversation struck between me and a girl that accidentally send a message to my phone two days ago. It was a case of wrong number. However it didn't stop us to have conversation for the past days. For a 25 year old she is quite friendly and shared with me a lot of things. Just say, no stone is left unturned. Her favorite quote would be "well that is the traits of typical Aries". She justified herself based on her zodiac. For me I am not that keen to use zodiac as means to get to know someone, because people are unpredictable. Nevertheless one wrong message, and I made a new friend. 

I am Capricorn, by the way. 

Monday, September 16, 2013

The Break up

Watching the break up (Vince Vaughn & Jennifer Aniston) made me think a lot of things. Not that the movie was that good but it made me uttered this statement;

"Mi Casa Mi Casa, Su Casa Su Casa" definitely not "Mi Casa Su Casa"

Mind in the gutter

Attended a class that affirmed my thought that;
A. People fear what they don't understand
B. A sample doesn't represent a population 
C. Educated people can be narrow minded and shallow in defining certain issues
D. Most of us are sheep that follow a shepherd command or views without depth 

My lecturer shared his views and said that he was a part of a body that was responsible in curbing the growing issue of LGBT 6 years ago. The way he explained his roles as well as how they approached the matter saddened me a lot. I felt so uncomfortable sitting in the class and looking at everyone nodding in agreement to whatever he said. I have the sinking feeling that some idiots in the class might propose to do a class project of creating awareness by highlighting the negative of this sexual orientation.

I don't know how things will get better if our future educators and those who deemed themselves educated think that LGBT is all about SEX.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

What if straight was gay and gay was straight

I am not trying to force anything on anyone. Just sharing what lack of tolerance can do.

Wedding bliss

A conversation with a friend compels me to write on the issue of marriage. She wanted to see my perspectives on the issue and it was an interesting conversation indeed.

The definition of marriage varies. The textbook definition would be "the formal union of a man and a woman, typically recognized by law, by which they become husband and wife." Malachi 2:4 defined marriage as a holy covenant before God. Within the Jewish custom "it's not the "ceremony" that's important in a marriage, it's the couple's covenant commitment before God and men. For Christian, marriage goes beyond the earthly covenant as well, it is also represent the spiritual aspect of the relationship with God. As for Islam, the general purpose of marriage is that the sexes can provide company to one another, love to one another, procreate children and live in peace and tranquility to the commandments of Allah. It is also deemed as "mithaq" - a solemn covenant (agreement). 

Her quest in searching for perspectives on the matter have brought forth some interesting responses, some couples prefer not to be tied down, others consider marriage is a way of conforming to heterosexual ways of life. There is also a response saying that for Muslim gays "who will recite the acceptance of "aqad", who will play the role of the groom, for those who believe that there should not be any  gender stereotype persona".

As for me, I told her, if I was given a chance I would love to take the leap with my better half, however living in Malaysia it would be impossible and the marriage would not have any legal weight (unfortunately). So technically being in this relationship once a couple decided to move in with each other is a marriage itself. To be committed with the relationship, and to be trustful of each other. Infidelity and promiscuity are there in any relationship, married or not, regardless of any sexual orientation.

Everyone despite their sexual orientation has that desire even a spark to walk down the isle or to be a part of the wedding ceremony and say "I do" or "aku terima nikahnya", or just a civil ceremony that have no connotation of religious aspect no matter who your better half is. I guess the idea of being someone's wife or someone's husband and with proof to show is an empowering feeling that finally the cycle of life is complete. And the journey to grow old together begin.

On a lighter note, in the word of Rita Rudner "I love being married. It is so great to find that special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life".

Saturday, September 7, 2013

I am more like this...

I tried to be back in the dating game and yet I found it hard because of some reasons.
1. I don't look like this
I am more like this

2. I am not fun enough
I am more like this

What do I think about this;

Sisterly love

My friends saw this picture and said "You started at early age, no wonder". 

P/s : This is not the beginning of my sexual confusion. This is how my sister showed me how much she loves me when we were young. Now, a kiss from her on my cheek would make me say "ewwwwwww".


I skipped my dragon boat training today, because two of my sisters are at home with 4 cars but no one to drive them. My mum and my two other sisters went back for a wedding at my hometown.

My eldest sister and I have a love hate relationship. Being the eldest she has the authority of dictating me since we were young, to be specific since we started school. I never forget the disagreements, the arguments and the fights we had, both of us have a different role to play in the family, she is the responsible one, as for me, I am the "gung-ho" type. But today both of us went for an early jog, and had some overdue conversation. We even had a race. 

Sis  : Jom lumba
Me : Jom. Loser will buy breakfast.(hehehe)
Sis  : On your mark, SET, GO!

We moved our feet as fast as we can, and at one time I knew that I was leading, because she slowed her pace. We were walking on air and our feet didn't even touch the ground but we end our race with a smile. After that we went to buy breakfast. And I paid. 

We raced on this...hehehe

What I do every Saturday.

It started with, "Hey, come to the introduction". And I did. Since the first week of Ramadhan I have been joining this group of amazing people, that you can really see how passionate they are for the sport.

Thursday, September 5, 2013

My Brain

My boss made a statement that listening to music while doing work is not a very healthy habit for my hearing. Then she ended it with a question;

Boss : Why do you listen to music when you are doing your work?
Naz  : I am left handed, so I need to keep my left brain occupied when my right brain is busy working.
Boss : (A very weird look)

Plus, I don't listen to music, I listen mostly to TED Talks. 

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Sleep Dial

I woke up this morning with a surprise. As usual I would check my phone and O.M.G!!!!!! I sleep dialled my ex-dean at 5.38 a.m. for 1.06 minutes. I do wonder what did I say to her, or did I say anything, or perhaps she doesn't have my number and for her it would be just some crazy person playing a prank on her or did I snored. The possibilities are endless.!!!!!!! I am freaking out. or perhaps it  just went directly to voice mail.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Six vs Sex

LTL : What does Nicholas want?
Naz : He wants something for his new recruits. He has SIX recruits from his previous recruitment.

All Colleagues : Ha!!! He had SEX with recruits.

Clear pronunciation is important, remember that.

An interesting encounter

Yesterday, after a long day of doing nothing productive, I went to Putrajaya Maritime Center, just to check out the pool. Not that I can swim anyway, I felt the need to submerge my aching body in the water and enjoy the moment. I did few rounds of what my swimming instructor taught me in the previous training session at least  with some improvement. As I was about to call it a day, I saw this person was trying to get out of the pool but he slipped, automatically I said "Be careful". He looked at me and smiled. Instead of going through with his intention to exit the pool, he swam a bit and struck a conversation with me, asking me my name, where I work and even my age. I told him my age, he doesn't seem to mind for me being older than him, it didn't stop him from continuing the conversation. I shared with him that I can't swim, and he started to give me encouragement to really try and swim because for him swimming is a good exercise. I noticed from the corner of my eye, that his companion was observing our conversation and looked at me with a smile. He glanced to his companion and she signaled him it was time to go. Before he left, he reminded me to come again next week because he wants to teach me how to swim.There and then I thought that was a very sweet gesture and kinda cute as well. 

So I will mark on my calender next Saturday or Sunday, I will have a date with Mukhriz, a 9 year old boy who wants to teach me how to swim. 

He looked back and waved at me with a smile holding his mother's hand as he walked away from the pool.